I have been bugged by a few things recently and my emotion level dipped to a very low level.
And when someone else came in with a similar topic that I was bugged with, I immediately flamed and erupted. Then eventually when all hell has broken loose and I finally realised what I have done, it came to this point: apologize.

While I have the habit of saying “sorry” for the most minor of things (which incidentally is unhealthy) and not feel bad about it, a true apology always prick me hard. The worst is when I had to apologize over a medium like email or text or instant messaging and the other party do not respond with a ” You are forgiven” or some similar statement, I am left hanging in mid-air trying to figure out if my apology has been accepted.

I wonder if anyone out there have similar situation.

In my opinion, in this current world, everyone seems to have forgotten how to give a correct response.
I mean, if I wasn’t forgiven, I would rather the person tell me that “I have not forgave you”, or “I’m still angry”, rather than no response at all.

Another similar situation happened this afternoon when my dad did not come home after a long while. We knew he was out to help my mum buy lottery tickets, but he can’t be 2 hours delayed right? We tried to call him but no response. He did not pick up the phone nor any call returned. When my mum tried calling several minutes later, he finally picked up his mobile phone. Turns out that, he drove out to a parts shop 20mins away from our house to buy some replacement parts for the television he was repairing.
That let me realised one habit we all have: “if that call was important, the person will call again.”

But, what happen if the person never return that call or that was the last call he/she trying to reach you before he/she passed out or died?

Can’t we give a response? Is that really hard to give a response?

I realised at work that it happens a lot when there are multiple recipients in an email. Everyone were waiting everyone else to respond first. Really, is that necessary?

I can’t remember when it all started but I’ll always remind myself every time I see a miss call on my phone now, I will definitely call back; even to the dismay to find out that it was a wrong number or the annoying bank sales.
Never go without a response.
It may be the last for the other.

So, till now, I have apologize 3 times to the person I had erupted to. Twice on Facebook private chat, once on mobile text. I hope to get a response. Whether I was forgiven, or even if she hadn’t; at least I know a “sorry” wasn’t enough and I can get into action in finding out the next possible step to repair the relationship.

An update:
I talked to another friend of mine, K about thos. She just thinks I’m overreacting. She also mentioned that my friend might be busy to even be bothered.

Turns out, K is right.
I met this friend of mine and she seems tired from her work. She seems alright and we immediately started talking without much awkwardness.
So I guess all well ends well!